Top Ten Tips For A Happy, Healthy, More Fulfilled Life Through The Way That You Think
Tip 1
Let go of your personal history. Accept it, understand it
(Get help with this if you need to) and then move on. Losing the blame
mentality is a really tough one for many people but the truth is that
however the past affected you, you own it - No one can upset you, no one
can 'make' you angry or anything else unless you allow it to.
Losing the blame is incredibly self empowering because then you can
begin to take control of the only thing you have - and that is the way
you 'allow' yourself to react to somebody else's actions or situation.
Tip 2
Remove pressuring
dictating words from your language. Words such as 'You should do this',
'You must do that', Nobody likes to be dictated to and often we are
speaking from our view of the world according to our values. Learn to
release your control a little on how you need things to be in your life,
needing is just that - needy. Tell yourself that you can want things a
certain way but you don't 'need' them to be that way in order for you to
be happy.
Tip 3
Drop your negative labels
'I'm so
useless', 'I never get anything right' 'I am a worrier because my
parents were worriers' etc. A famous quotation by Ralph Waldo Emerson
states: 'You become what you think about all day long.' Once
you label yourself, you begin to act as if it were true. Think about
those childhood beliefs suggested by others that you may still hold on
to today.
Tip 4
Become aware of when you are thinking Automatic Negative Thoughts - (ANTS)
perhaps
you are fortune telling - Predicting how you think things will turn out
with no actual evidence of that, or Mind Reading - Such as ' He's
probably thinking I'm stupid'.
Tip 5
Stop confusing thought with fact. This is what happens when you think something and act as if it were true.
Just
because you believe something to be true does not necessarily mean that
it is, It is simply your perception of the facts based on past
experiences and unhelpful distorted irrational thinking. Worrying about
anything that might happen in the future based on past or any other
negative experiences does not in it self change anything.
Tip 6
Believe
in yourself, If you do not believe in yourself, how can you expect
anyone else to or for yourself to achieve what it is that you want to
achieve. No one can experience life exactly the way you do. By believing
in your own judgement, gaining a sense of independence and knowing that
you can handle anything, good or bad will help you to continue
to grow. Turn obstacles into challenges and continue to surprise
yourself. Become your own best friend and encourage yourself. Ask
yourself Do I 'believe' I can do this, Do I 'believe' it will work out?
As Henry Ford said "Whether you believe you can, or whether you believe you can't you're probably right"
Tip 7
Do
not allow yourself to go through life living out unfulfilled dreams
over and over. If you want to give up your job and train as something
else ask yourself what is it that is REALLY stopping you and start
there. Often it is based around FEAR. Fear of failure, fear of not being
good enough, fear of rejection etc. Turn 'What If' into a 'So What'
mentality.
Tip 8
Visualize yourself as living the life you
want to lead and then get to work on making it happen by
only focusing on positive steps and blocking out any negative, unhelpful
thoughts. Try visualizing stepping into the shoes of someone already
living that way to get a sense of how it feels. Be prepared to let go of
some of your perfectionism for things to go 100% the way you want them
to.
Tip 9
Become more mindfully aware of being in the moment -
Notice how when you are driving a car you are not experiencing the
moment - You may be allowing your thoughts to worry or be distracted by
past or future events. Loosen your grip on the steering wheel bring your
thoughts back to the present moment and practice living your life that
way whether you are at work, at home or wherever you are. In this way it
becomes much easier to let things go and not hold onto resentment. As
Wayne Dyer quotes 'It's not the snake bite that kills you, but the venom that flows around your body'.
Tip 10
Laugh
at life, it is simply an experience rather like a character you are
playing, and you get to choose whether you want to play
the vulnerable victim, the nasty one the kind one, the easy going one
etc at any given time. Know that you are not stuck in a certain way just
because you've always been that way.
When is 'Now' going to be a good time to change the way that you think for the better?
Today? Next week? Or only in your dreams of your ideal life?
A Cognitive Behavioral Life Coach
can support you with all of this. If you feel you could benefit from
having someone on your side supporting you through this process, then
research the Life Coaches listed.
Begin living the life you've always dreamed about and become the person that you've always wanted to be.
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